Before we were married Jordan and I made the commitment to always try to get away with each other at least once a year. We’ve made it happen every year so far even though it has been hard to sort logistics out every time. Last year we did get away all though as soon as we got to Gatlinburg we had to turn around and come home because Hadassah got sick. But it still counts. Because we went! You have to give us some grace on that one.

This year we divided our kids in different directions (Rahab visited my mom and dad, Hadassah visited Jordan’s parents, and Mr. Darcy was well cared for by Lydia). Jordan and I headed for a weekend in Nashville. We call this an anniversary celebration, but we were really celebrating about 4 years and 3 months. Timing isn’t that important and actually this was the perfect time for us to get away, because it was the weekend before school started meaning we are about to go back to our crazy school semester schedule where we say “bye” to Jordan as he leaves for school at 10:30AM, he goes from school to work and then gets back home at 12:30AM. These are dreadfully long days apart and it’s good to have a weekend of just enjoying each others presence nonstop to emotionally prepare for the madness! (Jordan took two summer classes, which is a lot for graduate school and working full time. But they were mostly online, with a few full days on campus. And to me there’s just such a difference when he is home being a presence. Even if he is busy when he is home, it’s distinctly better than being away all together).

I had my set of concerns for each child. We never leave our kids. Not even for a few hours. Our once a year overnighter is about it. So we are in no way used to the feeling of leaving them and they are in no way used to the feeling of being left.

I knew Hadassah would have super fun days at Gigi’s house, but I also knew Gigi wouldn’t be getting much sleep at night, if any. I also knew it was really probable that Hadassah would not eat anything or poop at all the whole time we were gone. It’s just who she is. she needs her mom for such strenuous tasks! 😉 We love her and she’s fabulous…. But these things about her are just true. 🙂

I was pretty confident that my mom would get a full night sleep with Rahab, but I also knew that Rahab’s days would be pretty hard. Rahab likes her mommy a lot right now and she can be pretty good at fussing to communicate that sentiment. She’s just at the fussier, messier, stinkier phase of life in general. We love her and she’s perfectly precious in every way. But those things about her are just true. 🙂

And Mr. Darcy, … Well… Actually…. I wasn’t worried about him at all. Sorry, bud. And I don’t have a picture of him and Lydia either. Bless him.

I don’t think twice about caring for my own children in these ways because they’re my babies and I’m their mom. It’s what I signed up for. But inflicting these tasks on people whom I love and have already fulfilled their years of diapers and tantrums and sleepless nights is not something I’m good at doing. I love being there to watch our parents enjoy our kids and then I love being able to rescue them when my children start acting particularly childish. In my opinion, grandparents should have all fun jobs and parents should rescue them from any task or behavior that is the least bit negative in any way. Grandparents = good guys who let you stay up late and watch movies and eat candy and always say “yes.” Parents = bad guys who do the dirty work, make you eat nasty stuff, and say “no”.

All these things being said, our kids were in the best hands possible. I wasn’t worried about them as much as I just felt bad to burden our parents in the specific ways that would come from each child. 😉

When we made the commitment to leave our kids at least once a year to just be together, it was a really easy commitment to make because we didn’t have any kids. It’s pretty hard in real life to figure out logistics of getting your kids to family that live pretty far away, and back from family at the end of the trip, and budgeting money to get out of town, and rearranging work schedules, and just doing what it takes to make it happen. But we still recognize the absolute importance of it and we are still just as committed to it as we were on June 4th, 2011, and maybe even more committed to it because we more fully understand how needed it is.

Our kids did better than expected (OR Our parents were just looking at them through rose colored and gracious glasses. But, either way we count this a success!)

And what were Jordan and I up to?

A fabulous bed and breakfast.

Lots of yummy food.

  
Being too poor to put change in the massage chairs, and too poor to think its morally acceptable to charge people 5$ for one strip of photos in the photo booth (guys, it’s free to sit in the booth and take selfies. So do that. That’s what we did.)

Shakespeare in the park to see Henry V along with a first ever experience for us: food trucks!

We toured some civil war homes and a civil war field hospital. (Can I just say, … I really love having a husband with a history degree. He can tell me what everything means and I never have to read any museum signs. This is definitely the life to be lived. Hands down.) We also walked through a cemetary of unknown soldiers. It was very sobering. 

Most of all and best of all: enjoying each other’s un interrupted company and having a whole weekend to explore the depths of each others hearts… Having deep and meaningful conversations that can sometimes be pushed aside by the many demands of the day that are trying to pull us each in different directions.

He asked me how he can make me feel most cherished and prioritized in the little bits of time we do have together this semester. I asked him how I can best serve him as he is so busy. We talked about how we can communicate to our kids that they are a joy and a blessing to us. We talked about how Jordan can maximize his time with them. We talked about where we are spritually, individually and together. We talked about what we are reading on our own and we read together. We talked about sins we are struggling to put to death. We talked about light hearted things, too, and we laughed a lot. We went on walks early in the morning and late at night and in the rain. We slept through the night (ok. Well. We didn’t do that because … Diabetes. But we came as close to sleeping through the night as we probably ever will. And it was nice).

Jordan and I like to play this “game.” I ask Jordan questions about me and before I tell him how I would answer he has to tell me how he *thinks* I will answer. And then we swap. Questions as silly as “what’s your favorite song?” or questions serious like “what makes you feel the most fulfilled?” It’s a fun way to see how well we know each other (or how wrong we are about eachother sometimes) and its a cool way to get to know eachother better. 🙂 Not only do I get to tell Jordan how I feel about things, but I get to learn how he perceives I feel about things. It’s really interesting. Haha.

This is a busy season. And while we DID come here to seminary for the single purpose of preparing to leave here for ministry, we don’t want to “just get by” in this time. We don’t want to neglect this time and wish it away because we know it had an end. We want to treasure our marriage here and our life here and our kids here. We don’t want to sweep issues under the rug with the excuse “it will be better when Jordan isn’t a full time masters student and a full time superviser.” This season matters and we have to nurture each other in this time, too.

Yes, this is just our journey to our ultimate goals. But isn’t that all of life? And isn’t that what we are to find joy in together? We think so! So we are striving to love eachother and our neighbors. We are striving to prioritize what needs to be prioritized and lay aside things that don’t. Yes. This season is busy. But life is busy. This season is hard. But life is hard. We don’t want to be “painting pictures of Egypt.” The Israelites were freed from slavery and then grumbled “slavery was actually pretty good. This place stinks.” Every season that our family has lived through, and every season or family will live through in the future, will be hard in different ways. And we’ve committed to finding joy in all of it together.

This weekend was a sweet and special time and next year is already in the books.

We will go again because we are committed to growing in love for each other. We will leave our kids again because we love eachother even more than we love them.

And by loving each other the most we are loving our kids in the biggest possible way we can.