There are a lot of burdens in this life but she isn’t one of them. My seconds with her really are numbered. I know because her bald head grew curls. Her coos turned into words and now sentences. Her crib turned into a bed.

So there are worse things than a long night, mommy. Somehow I imagine myself waking up from a full nights sleep in 30 years and I bet you that I won’t feel magically fulfilled. Because what you complain about is actually the beautiful stuff. And I want to know that before it’s too late to cherish it.So be thankful for every chance to be like Jesus. Even if that is 6 consecutive times in the time that “normal people” are getting one unit of rest. Be thankful for the opportunity to show them what sacrifice looks like. Be glad to get another chance to consider the interests of others more important than your own. Remember that love is patient ….. Remember that love is not resentful ….. Remember that love is kind and that it does not insist on its own way. Know that when we fail to be those things we are really failing to love. And most importantly, look to the one who has perfectly fulfilled love….. Because that’s who’s love we are trusting in…. and because that’s the kind of love that we are now strictly called to.

Remember the One who sacrificed so much more than sleep for us. Remember how He sweat drops of blood …alone… while his own disciples, His “friends,” slept from pure emotional and physical exhaustion …. without him. Jesus is the one that we model our love after. And Jesus’ love is the love by which we are accepted … because we can’t love like that. Because left to our own our “love” looks more like complaining about our kids to our small groups.

I am sorry for when I have talked about you like you are a burden to me, and for when I have treated you as if you were a bother, and for when I have not been loving while doing the mundane for you. Parenting is a long lesson in selflessness. And if you think about it… Sleep is a relatively small way to die to myself.

I love you when I’m tired, Hadassah Joy.

“By this we know love, that He laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.” – 1 John 3:16